The second poem written after yet another Gunn breakup. I was still debating whether I really believed him when he said "I love you" at this point. Despite all the issues I had been having with him, and how upset I became over his need to control parts of my life, still I had wondered if I really did love him. I kept going back, right? Didn't that mean something?
Meaning of Love
I'm here all alone
with nothing but my own thoughts
they are my worst enemy
It's dark here
I see nothing in my life
I see you
You've come and gone
and come and gone
and come and gone again
Every time you hurt me
my heart grows
a little colder inside
Tears fall down my cheeks
I want to break down
I do so silently
You never knew
how bad you burned me
with your ice-cold stare
I melted beneath your affections
but I have learned
now I steel myself against you
You will never hurt me again
I won't let you, I can't...
I've let you too many times already
Is this what love means?
- 07 December 2003
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